Mickz

It's been nine minutes since the message from Jade came through. In those nine minutes, I have rolled out of bed, thrown my phone back onto my bed, and paced around my room like some dickhead.

WHY AM I FUCKING NERVOUS TO REPLY BACK!

I need to get a grip, fast or I'll make a fool of myself.

**Buzz Buzz**

My phone vibrates again but this time I waste no time and lunge onto my bed grabbing my phone in the process.

"Jade: I know it's selfish, especially with us being in a pandemic but I was wondering if you would be able to keep me company for a few hours. I understand if you can't x"

I read the message back three times just to make sure I wasn't bugging out. The girl I wanted to see all this time has invited me over but leaving to go would be the wrong thing to do. Of course, I've been to the shops, the park and long walks but this is different, this would involve me being in contact with another person. Has she been following the government guidelines? Has she been prancing about with other people? Does she have the virus and not know? All these things sent my brain into overdrive, I've been that same person cussing those that have been gathering together but can I really let this chance slide?

Thirty minutes have gone by and I still haven't responded and it's getting later and later. Will I be able to sneak out of my house? Because my mum will not allow me to leave in this climate. Well, what she doesn't know won't hurt her and that goes for everyone else to be honest. I will keep a two-meter distance whilst I'm with her and everything will be fine.

She only wants company, I tell myself repeatedly.

Before I allow time to run away any longer I reply back to her.

"Sorry for the late reply I took a nap. I can keep you company for a few hours even though we have to keep a two-meter distance sigh"

I pressed send and felt like a load had been lifted off my shoulders.

**Buzz Buzz**

If not for Jade I would've switched my phone to silent by now because of this nonstop buzzing noise.

"Jade: Yay, 41 Wanstead Lane, IG1 3SF"

It was almost 11 o'clock and Uber had just notified me that it was outside my house waiting. This was the hard part, leaving the house without being noticed. Luckily for me, everyone in the house had their own consistent routine.

It didn't take long from me to reach the front door, roughly 18 seconds if I was counting...which I most certainly was. Not one person in sight so I open the front door and close it slowly behind me. Next thing you know I'm getting comfortable in the Uber with my thirty-minute drive about to get underway.

Water droplets have been hitting the car windows throughout this journey. I didn't think torrential rain could be so shy, or could it be teasing me for the real action, when I set foot out of this Uber.

After a few more minutes the car started slowed down and came to a halt. I looked outside to see a huge house along with an equally huge drive-through.

I got out of the car and walked towards the only house in front of me, number 41. I have this thing where I call people to let them know I'm outside before I knock or press the buzzer.

"Hey, I think I'm outside," I say calmly.

moments later the front door opened and there she was stood right in front of me.

She had her individual braids inspired by pop smoke, I could see her perfectly shaped breast sitting gracefully. They were in proportion to her small frame with nipples that were contained and well defined, not spreading and stretched. My eyes lowered its gazed and caught sight to her curves but I began to feel paranoid...How long have a being staring at her for?

"Nathanial, you can come inside," she said knocking me out of thoughts. "I don't bite."

As much as I heard her speak my attention was firmly on her lips. I wondered how they tasted, how soft they were...I wanted to kiss her the first time I saw her but something stopped me. Would it be selfish if I tried tonight knowing that we're in a pandemic?

I followed her inside and shut the door behind with thoughts of what intimacy with her might be like.

Sixty-Four days had gone by since our incompetent government put in place a 'lockdown'. A lockdown that was supposed to ease the emerging strain on the Nhs and of course stop the number of people dying from this fucked up disease.

My mistake was believing people would follow the rules.

Can I blame them? No, no I can't, especially when the Prime Minister is being as clear as a baby with a dummy in its mouth.

"Stay home, save lives, protect the Nhs." Echoes from my laptop and spreads through to every corner of my room. I go from laying down and facing my ceiling to sat up frustrated and restless. I shake my head violently. I pound it down again and again, but my thoughts will not dislodge themselves.

COVID-19 really came to ruin my life in 2020.

Well, not all is lost I guess...I have good health, my family is good and this girl and I are going great!

It's been eighty-seven days since I first laid eyes on her. A day I won't forget in a while but due to busy life schedule and COVID-19, we haven't been able to meet up again. Communicating, on the other hand, hasn't been an issue. We speak practically every day if not phone calls then we're messaging on WhatsApp. Thursdays she tends to be MIA due to personal reasons so I don't hear from her.

Guess what today is....Thursday! Now I have a life outside of talking to her but boredom does strike me.

I'm tired of being productive and trying to force myself to put out content on social media. At first, the thought of having all this free time to be creative was exciting, but as the days have practically merged into one another I realise it's not by force nor is it a competition to see who can do this or that.

It's okay to just rest and do nothing!

The sun giving was giving off a sense of serenity, a peace that invited itself into the soul. It was definitely time for my one hour walk and maybe to buy something whilst I was at it too.

Quarter to eight in the evening, I was on the streets of London and things felt different. The air felt clean but you could also feel the tension. People were surprisingly out, more people than I had expected to see outside. In the same breath, everyone I saw had gloves on and some sort of makeshift mask covering their face. I looked down at my own glove and protective mask and instantly started overthinking.

What scares me is being forgotten. You always have someone there, whether it's family, friends, or strangers. That's not what I mean. I'm scared that when I'm laid to rest, that time itself will forget me; that I would've lived an insignificant life surrounded by people who will be remembered as heroes. I am scared that despite all the good things I do, I'll still be no-one.

I take a seat on a nearby bench. I Inhale and exhale, trying to get rid of this built-up anxiety. I check the time on my phone, I see its well over eight o'clock! Either everyone is tired of clapping for the Nhs or I was so deep in my thoughts I didn't hear a thing. Either way, my outside adventure was done for the day. The sun gradually began to take back the light it was emitting and before you knew it darkness cloaked over us.

My phone, social media, and I...That is what my night will consist of, it's one of the consistent things in my life right now. I've been scrolling and switching apps nonstop since I got back home. Twitter, the devil's playground is where you will find all sorts of information. The latest one that struck me was the recent murder of a young black man, no older than 28. Same age as me, yet I didn't really feel a thing. The number of black killings recently has made me feel numb and desensitised.

An investigation is said to have opened for the murder of William Boateng...

I stop reading and rest my phone between my nose and my lips. I don't know why but this envokes a form of calmness in me. There's only so much negativity I can take but in a world where negativity is currently rife there is nothing to be done about it, I just stay calm, do healthy things and then everything is okay again. That is the cycle.

***Buzz Buzzz***

My phone lights up but is still balanced on my face. I remove it and check to see what notification has come through.

"Jade: Hey Nathanial are you free?"

Maybe I am God's favourite I thought to myself.

I have always been attracted to her simplicity.

The way she switched up her look effortlessly and not an ounce of beauty would be compromised. She was rich in melanin, no taller than 5 foot 6, so naturally, I towered over her the day we first met. My tall frame would tower over most women but mine was met with her brown earthy eyes. Captivating and deep, I stood there in a trance wondering what this feeling coursing through me was.

Not lust but Infatuation.

When you're with great company time flies! This was no different, it was almost midnight and the bar assistant came over to tell us they were closing in ten minutes.

I didn't want the night to end here. But how could I say that without coming across like a creep? This was the first time meeting up after all.

We stood outside the bar waiting for an Uber to arrive and take us home. The flickering lights from the lampposts danced across the dark sky, each color slowly fading into another. The frosty winter air caressed my skin, and my hands were freezing from not wearing any gloves, but I couldn't care less. Again I was caught in a trance this time whilst she was speaking, I know I should be paying attention but her lips.

Lips so full of passion, and the promise of the sweetness to come.

"I need to see her again."

"Where did that come from?" Her voice broke my trance.

"Oh shit, I was thinking out loud," I said whilst scratching my head out of embarrassment paired with an awkward grin.

Thankfully her Uber arrived to stop my awkwardness coming out full throttle.

We hugged and I watched her get into her Uber but just before she shut the door she said, "Let me know when you want to see me again."

And that was the seal of approval that the universe needed to keep us bound together.

Distance was all that mattered as I ran up the stairs. Tears were gushing down my face, my heart ricocheting against my chest with immense speed and the echo of my mum's voice shouting for me to get to safety was still lingering in the air.

Thank God my room has a lock, I thought to myself as I shut the door and locked it. I then barricaded the door with my huge chest of draws. Where I got the strength to push is beyond me but I guess with all this adrenaline passing through it makes sense.

Now buried in my wardrobe I kept silent listening out for my mum. I hadn't heard anything since I got up here. The last thing I remember was the sound of a car pulling up to the house with a bright light shining through the window almost blinding the both of us.

Is she okay? Does she need my help? Why is all of this fucked up shit happening?

It's all my fault...

"Stay away!"

I jumped at the sound of her voice.

The door downstairs began to bang in unison with someone's voice that was filled with immense rage but I couldn't make out who it was. Then there was another loud bang.

I slowly opened one side to my wardrobe, gently walked over to my door to unlock it. I'm sure this was stupid but I had to see if my mum was okay.

I tried my best not to make any sort of noise as I opened the door slightly but I failed with flying colours. I was frozen on the spot. I looked left then right but saw nothing either side of the hallway, it was clear for me to proceed.

I tiptoed down the stairs, holding one hand firmly across my mouth. In the silence, I could hear the wind sweeping around. It was dark outside and inside the house apart from the flicker of light to the right of me in the passageway leading to the front room.

As my right foot settled on the floor on my arrival downstairs I felt a draft swirl up on the left-hand side where the front entrance was. When I looked towards that direction the door was slightly open. My heart felt like it was literally colliding against my chest fiercely, I felt the hairs on my arms stand to attention, as an army of chills march down my spine.

"Aaliyah run! Get out of here".

I turn around to see my mum spread out on the floor.

Literally, at that moment everything fell away. I can no longer hear anything, my focus is firmly fixed on her as I look on.

I attempt to rush to her side but then I feel a sharp pain to the side of my head that makes me lose balance. I slam into the ground hard, everything is slowly going pitch black. The light flickering allows me to briefly see two figures standing next to each other.

I guess this is where it all ends.

Silence lingered in the air, like the deferred moments before a falling glass shatters on the ground. There was smoke everywhere because of the amount of cars screeching whilst they came in, surrounding everyone. Thick residual of smoke shifted around the atmosphere, taking the shape of ghosts in the air. Instantly the silence was disrupted; by what sounded like footsteps rushing forward in an organised formation…

“Nobody, do anything stupid”, a voice ordered, as the smoke slowly began to clear up - making it easier for everybody to see their surroundings again. There stood the officer that approached both Chris and Omar accompanied by over a dozen men in uniform circling everyone with guns pointing; ready to shoot.

“Hahahaha we finally meet Officer Connor”, laughter suddenly erupted from a peculiar source. The dealer stood still, displaying a sense of humour, but nobody seemed to understand the joke, as the situation at hand was no laughing matter.

“I must say you’ve outdone yourself this time round Chris, I didn’t think you had it in you to double cross me. In case you didn’t know, my resources extend to the police force little boy, so I came prepared.” the dealer oozed confidence.

Chris couldn’t believe what he just heard, and with Omar still on his knees stunned with total shock, nothing could have prepared either of them for what came next.

“Lay on the ground!” Officer Connor yelled as he started cautiously moving forward in the direction of the dealer. Suddenly, the two black vans that were behind the dealer opened simultaneously. Men dressed in all black came spurting out firing with assault rifles. The sound of bullets echoed through the cold air; bodies were falling from both sides in the array of gunfire.

Chris managed to drag Omar behind one of the police cars, neither of them was carrying a firearm so all that was left for them to do was to wait patiently and hope for the best outcome. In the centre of the action, the dealer rattled down the officer’s men headshot after headshot. Conner was backed up behind a car with two of his remaining men, tactfully trying to take out the opposition. At this point, the sound of the bullets became a soundtrack of death, which was on the cards, for everyone.

“Connor, come out come out wherever you are. That goes for you as well Chris, this can only end one way.” The dealer was carefully wondering around the many dead bodies laid to waste as he looked for Chris and Connor.

“I’m sorry bro, but honestly, I had no choice,” whispered Chris as he and Omar who was now fully aware of what was going on, they began moving quietly from car to car, desperate not to get spotted by the dealer.

“You always have a fucking choice, but now isn’t the time. Let’s try and survive this mess then go our separate ways after” Chris continued, Omar didn’t look at him once as they moved from car to car.

There is no sound, yet everyone is moving, moving and not talking. The dealer and his remaining men who have not been taken out are discreetly preying on Chris, Omar and officer Conner.

“Shhh, do you hear that?” whispered Chris, as he stopped moving.

“It’s nothing, just stay low and keep moving forward,” Omar was in front, so he couldn’t see a thing behind him.

“Chris? Chris?”

As Omar turned his head to figure out why Chris wasn’t responding, to his horror he discovered the problem, and he froze in his crouched position. Conner as well as his two men had taken ahold of Chris with a gun pointed at his head.

“I’m not going to hurt him, but I need both your co-operation.” Conner slowly lowered his gun to prove he wasn’t lying. After a few moments of talking strategy, a plan was configured to take down the dealer.

“I’m not sure about this, to be frank.” Chris was never sure about any plan that wasn’t his.

“Have you been in a situation like this before?”

“No.”

“Exactly, so shut up and get ready before he spots us before we’ve even put this plan in motion.”

Conner seemed very confident his plan would work. Meanwhile, Omar kept silent throughout everything, he was just observing and listening.

“I’m getting very bored of waiting around for you vermin to come out. Conner, you think I don’t know that you have no reinforcements coming? I also know that your deputy leader did not approve this investigation, so the blood spilt here tonight is on your hands.”

Both Omar and Chris turned in the direction of Conner in disbelief and Chris appeared utterly devastated. The pain, coupled with anger that was flowing through his body was unimaginable. He then glanced in the direction of Conner’s gun.

“Chris, don’t do anything silly we’ll handle this later,” Omar knew if he didn’t react when he did then it would have been a harsh ending for them. Conner and his two men didn’t look phased at what they saw.

“Take these two guns I’m sure you know how to use them, but just keep in mind there's about 10 rounds left in each of them so don’t waste it.”

The guns were like any other basic handguns, but knowing that they came from Conner, an exposed somewhat “dodgy” cop caused suspicions to be raised.

“Let’s say we survive this; how do we know you won’t frame us using these guns?” Omar being the type of person he was, couldn’t help but ask questions.

“You don’t, but right now you have to forget about everything you’ve heard and trust me if you want to survive.” The look on Conner’s face as he spoke looked of a man that was about to go into battle and determined to come out the victor.

Conner signalled to his two men to head to the right, whereas he, Omar and Chris started moving along the left. Then the unthinkable happened, two loud bangs pierced through the air. It was impossible to tell what had happened, the dealer and his men were nowhere to be seen. The same thing went for Conner’s men, which wasn’t good news either. Suddenly laughter broke out, “Hahahaha! Two down two to go!”

Conner lifted his head up to take a peek through one of the car windows. There lay his two men on the floor; blood oozing from their backs formed a never-ending trail.

“My plan has gone straight out the window,” Conner yelled frantically, his whole squad had been taken out.

“I tried to warn you, man, now let me show you how a real schemer deals with things.” Chris was now in his element, he thrived off of being in control of things. It didn’t take him long to conjure a plan of his own, all that was needed to be done, was to go through with it.

“You sure this will work?” Conner was not convinced at all.

“Well, I did successfully plan the diamond heist didn’t I?” Chris responded sharply in an ego-boosting manner.

“Fair point,” Conner admitted defeat to Chris.

“So, everyone knows their roles? Conner this whole thing weighs heavily on your shooting accuracy”.

Everyone gave a brief nod, thus signalling the start of the operation.

“Oi, old man you’re going to kill us so you might as well tell me your name,” Conner now purposely calling out the dealer in an attempt to get him and his men’s attention.

“Whatever you’re planning it won’t work Conner, there’s three of us and two of you.” The dealer sent his two men in the direction of Conner’s voice, then suddenly Chris’ voice broke out.

“Can’t we come to a civil understanding like real men? No more blood needs to be spilt.” With Chris speaking, the dealer knew what direction his voice was coming from, he signalled to both his men to split up and search for Chris and Conner.

Conner was slowly and quietly moving from car to car, he was scanning the section that he was currently at, but for the life of him, he couldn’t see his pursuer. There was shattered window glass all over the floor, after some time looking at them Conner came up with an idea to enable him to get a better view of his surroundings. He picked up one of the broken pieces of glass and used it to look at directions that would give his position away if he moved his body outwardly.

“I’m getting restless! I’m a very busy man,” the dealer was getting impatient.

“You look about 200 years old, you’ve had all the time in the world. So waiting around what harm you” Conner purposely trying to draw out one of the men. To his surprise he heard approaching footsteps, acting quickly he angled the broken glass he was holding to see if he could see the enemy approaching him…

Conner maintained a cool detachment to his targets. Mostly he preferred not to think of them, but when he did it was as if they were already dead. Then just like that Conner caught a glimpse of his target through the broken glass. In one motion he eyed his gun with his bleak grey eyes, the eyes of a hunter, whilst keeping his cool he turned, aimed and fired his gun.

The pursuers body fell as if it was snow settling on the ground.

“One down two to go,” Conner muttered as he reverted back to his position a few moments ago.

Meanwhile, Omar and Chris were fighting their own battle in trying to evade the last henchmen who was after them. Realising they were clueless about being in the front line, Omar and Chris knew they couldn’t afford to make any errors at this point.

“All I wanted was for Alissa to be healthy again. How did it come to this?” Omar brought out the picture of Alissa, which he carried with him everywhere. Chris could only watch as he spoke to himself. Knowing that this was entirely his fault, made his stomach turn.

“Stay here Omar,” Chris said as he quickly pushed past Omar whilst crouching down.

“What are you doing? I need to do this for the plan to work,” Omar said assertively as he grabbed ahold of Chris’ arm. They spent the next few seconds bickering not knowing that they were bringing attention to where they were.

“Get down!”

Instinctively Omar pulled Chris back onto the floor, as he heard Conner’s voice. They didn’t know it yet but Conner had just saved their lives.

“You fucking idiot, I knew you couldn’t be trusted,” Chris was raging

“Fuck you! I just saved both your lives.” Conner pointed to the now dead body that lay there on the ground.

“The plan is still on, go, go, go,” Chris realised that everything was still going according to his plan and sent Omar out stumbling.

The dealer had ended up back in his van waiting for his men to come back with the bodies of Chris and Conner. “At this rate, I’ll be sitting here waiting forever,” the dealer was getting restless and decided to go check out the situation at hand.

As soon as he stepped out he could see somebody stumbling in his direction. He started walking towards them, as he couldn’t see who it was but then they fell to the ground.

“Hahaha! Looks like I’ll be dealing the final blow”, the dealer was delighted at the prospect of getting his hands dirty.

“I remember this jacket that you stole from me, Chris, I just kept quiet because I knew I’d eventually have the opportunity to kill you” the dealer was now standing over the body which he thought to be Chris, he brought out his gun, turned the body over only to realise it wasn’t Chris…

“Shit!” The dealer wore a puzzled expression on his face.

“Oi! Over here,” With Conner shouting to get his attention the dealer got back up, only to catch a bullet in the shoulder forcing him to drop to the ground in anguish. Conner then bolted to where the dealer laid, “looks like your old age has you forgetting faces.” Chris was next to come rushing in as Omar was already there waiting.

“Yes! My plan fucking worked, I knew his obsession with killing Conner and me made him forget about Omar’s existence.” Chris was ecstatic

Omar started walking away towards the briefcase of money when all of a sudden he heard a loud bang go off. As he turned around, he saw to his amazement Conner’s lifeless body hit the ground. Chris was stood over his body just watching him fade away.

“Chris why! What have you done?” Omar was in much so shock that he vomited.

“It had to be done it was the only way we were going to leave this mess and have nothing come back to haunt us. Remember this whole thing wasn’t authorised so now with him dead we can walk away as if we were never here, you choose” Chris said assertively as he walked over to check on Omar.

“It doesn’t matter man, you killed an unarmed man, it isn’t right, and it’s low down” Omar shrugged Chris off of him as he was wiped the vomit off his mouth. Omar looked up to the sky, the clouds were no longer grey or white, instead, everything had been engulfed by darkness. It really set the mood and reflected the setting they were currently in.

“You amateurs will never learn, the first rule in combats is to never turn your back on the enemy,” the familiar voice of the dealer sent shockwaves through both Omar and Chris’ body as they turned around.

“WATCH OUT!” Chris yelled as he shoved Omar to the left of him.

Omar watched on as Chris started to grunt in pain. Blood started to flow from his mouth, he looked in the direction of the dealer and saw that from where he lay he had managed to get ahold of a gun and shoot Chris.

“Noo! You son of a bitch.” Omar's wide-open eyes echoed how he felt during that precise moment. Behind them was something more intense than anger and his clenched jaw meant that Omar was seeing red. He reached for his pocket and unloaded round after round in the direction of the dealer. They hit the dealer in the chest, propelling him backwards.

Omar immediately rushed to Chris’ body holding the top half of him in his arms.

“Stay with me man,” emotions flowed out of every pore on Omar’s body. As much as he fought back tears, they slowly crept up to the surface and escaped.

“Listen to me Omar, I never wanted to sell you out. Maya told me she’s pregnant again, and with my debt, I had no choice.” Chris was struggling to get his words out as his life began to slowly fade away.

“You don’t need to explain,” Omar reassured him.

“I know I don’t but listen to me, I love you, man. As part of the deal, I rearranged for Alissa to get top treatment. That’s out of the window but you have the money and the diamonds so get her the help she needs.” Chris’ breathing shortened, then moments after he was gone.

Omar had no choice but to leave the scene of this bloodbath with the money and diamonds. He took one of the dealers black vans, as he knew if he took what he and Chris came with it would raise suspicion on his whereabouts of the time this bloodbath.

Whilst driving back, all Omar could think about was how Chris had left behind a big family. He was happy that a solution for Alissa was now sorted, but his best friend was dead. Before getting home, Omar stopped outside Chris’ house to write a note to his wife. After he was done he went to leave the note and half the money from the heist outside their front door. He called her, pretending to be someone else so she could receive what he had left. It was his goodbye gift from him to her through Chris.

All that was left to do now was for Omar to go home to Alissa. He knew after the event’s that had happened his outlook on life would never be the same again. With that in mind he also knew that he was blessed with enough money to live a new life with his daughter.

I count to 30 seconds, holding my breath again, drowning in agitation, overwhelmed by fear. My pores are soaked, from all the perspiration. I’m watching him struggle to start the car, we both can’t afford to get caught here.

“Drive! Drive!” I could feel the tension spreading through my head like ink on paper but I had to take control.

“Fuck! I’m trying.” Time was ticking away; the engine just wouldn’t start. No matter what Omar did, the engine would just growl back at him.

“Argh, this stupid piece of shit!” Omar hysterically hit the steering wheel.

“Omar!”

He was broken. He wasn’t responding to me, it was like is mind had drifted elsewhere. If it was anyone else I would have just left them behind, but with Omar, I just couldn’t, after everything he had been through with his wife and now daughter. After all, we are doing this for Alissa even though I have my own shit to take care of.

““Oi! Omar, get it together we can’t stay here for much longer.”

Again, I shouted as I got out the car making sure I didn’t drop the small bag I was holding. The bag contained 10 diamond stones worth 700 thousand pounds that we just stole from an exhibition. I planned it, so there was no way we would fail, but after doing the hard part we are stuck here.

“Omar! Listen, if you don’t get out that car, Alissa won’t get the money she needs.”

Alissa was Omar’s little girl. I told him about this heist so he could pay for her medication. After his wife died, things got very tough so I have been helping him out when I can. He isn’t in my line of work but he had no choice and I needed help.

“Yeah, let's go”

I had just started jogging as he scampered out of the car. Omar wasn’t fast like me, so I had to slow down just so he could keep it.

It was bloody hot, probably 24 degrees or so. It felt as if I was running through hell itself; wearing all black made things even worse. If that bastard car did what it was meant to do, then we could have driven to the pickup point. Instead, I’m cutting corner after corner to get to our rendezvous. Sweat started to trickle down my face straight into my eyes, they were stung by a mixture of salty sweat and the contact lenses I was wearing.

“Chris how much further man, we’ve been running for long bruv!” Omar had finally caught up with me.

“We’re almost there, nobody can see us I know these back roads like my own dick.”

“Really nigga!”

Omar always liked to kill my jokes, he knew deep down if he was a bitch he would want this dick. I’m used to his disciplined fatherly ways but I refuse to change when I am around him. My phone started vibrating, which meant everything was going according to plan.

“Chris, I just saw you turn into the alleyway, I’m coming round in one minute. Just before the next turn I’m going to pull up so jump in”

“Love for that, make sure the doors open straight away.”

I was relieved because for a second I thought I was running around this place aimlessly. Chris must be shitting himself, thinking I have no idea where I’m running.

“Three, Two, One…”

Right on time a white van pulled up in front of us and just like I had asked the backdoors opened simultaneously. “Get in quick!” A voice said and with that, we lunged forward into the van.

“We made it, thank God.” I celebrated in the van; I knew we would complete this heist thanks to my brilliant planning.

“Was this your plan all along Chris? You should have fucking told me!”

“Relax man, I didn’t tell you because you would have started asking too many questions and you know that shit annoys me.” Omar as usual moving like a little bitch, he needs to learn how to go with the flow of things. I’m tired trying to get in a comfortable position amongst all this crap around me and he’s just yapping away.

“True, I have to thank you for everything bro. You know it means everything to me that you agreed to do this for Alissa.”

“You know I got you both always bro! It’s going to be a long five-hour journey back to Manchester so make yourself comfortable mate. I’m going to sleep, as breaking into places is tiring.” My eyes started to give way, I could just about make out what Omar was saying to me. In fact, I couldn’t give two shits.

“Chris, wake up already we’re back in manny.”

Slowly and reluctantly, I removed my hat from my face. I blink, close my eyes, and blink again. “That was quick, I was about to fuck this model man!” I hated people waking me up, especially when I was going to fuck bitches.

A few minutes later the van parked round the corner from Omar’s house. The driver was just some random guy that happened to have a van, and needed money, so I paid him the 200 pounds as agreed then off he went.

“Okay… so this is the plan, I’m going to meet the buyer in two days so if you want you can come.”

“Yeah no worries I’ll come with you, just let me know where and when.” Omar didn’t ask any questions like he usually did which frankly was a first but I knew it was because he wanted to see his daughter. We went our separate ways.

By the time I got home I was soaking wet from the fucking rain. Parking near Chris’s house was a bad idea; it left me with a 20minute walk home. All I wanted to do now was shower, eat and sleep.

“Christopher, is that you?”

“Maya! You know I don’t like that name stick to Chris man.”

Maya is my wife. We have been together for…well, to be honest, I don’t actually know. We have two girls that are annoying but I love them to bits and couldn’t imagine my life without them.

“Whatever Christopher! So how did your job in London go?” She said as she walked downstairs.

“Yeah it went well. We almost had a scare but everyone pulled through.”

Maya doesn’t know what really went down and if she did… she would leave me and take the kids with no hesitation. I went to prison for a few months, just before our first daughter was born. When I got out I promised I’d leave my old habits behind but having a criminal record makes life hard in terms of getting a job. We have also gotten into serious debt so this heist is meant to clear it all.

“Well done, when are you going to work again?”

“No idea, but hopefully soon.” I scratched my head whilst walking away from her. I hated lying but it was for the greater good.

“Don’t walk away from me! We’re not done here… so what do you mean you have no idea? Isn’t this a permanent job? You do realise we’re in fucking debt, Chris! I had to beg those debt collector officers to come back in a month!”

“Look, Maya, I’m taking care of it. Just fucking trust me!” I hated arguing with her. Although I despised her calling me Christopher, whenever she’s mad she calls me Chris.

“Take care of what? You’ve been saying this for over a year now and still nothing Chris. How am I supposed to raise another child living like this?”

“Wait, what? What do you mean another child?” I was in shock.

“I’m fucking pregnant Chris!” echoed through my eardrums. I froze… I couldn’t believe what Maya had just said. Overwhelmed didn’t come close to how I felt. Tears began to trickle down her eyes, all I could do at this point was go to her and hold her.

“I promise that things will be better. Things will be changing soon.”

Hours gradually passed by, Maya and I decided to order Chinese and watch a movie since the kids were at her sisters for a few days.

“Can you hear that?”

“It’s the film, stop being a scared you’re a grown woman.” I laughed out loud

“No seriously can’t you hear that knocking noise.”

I lowered the volume of the film just to piss her off but to my surprise, she was actually right.

“Okay, since you were right you go check who’s at our door at 2am.” I was being dead serious but she gave me one of her looks.

“Okay, I’m going. Shit man the things I do for you!”

I dragged myself down the stairs reluctantly taking my long umbrella with me. Once I got to the door the knocking sound noise stopped but to make sure it was all clear I asked if anyone was still there.

“Who’s outside?”

“Open up I want a word with you.” A stern voice penetrated through the door

“I’m not opening the door, fuck off or I will call the police!”

“I am the police so open the fuck up or I’ll arrest you right here, right now!” Confused, to say the least, I didn’t know if this was real or not. I wasn’t sure what to do.

“Christopher! Who is it? What’s all that shouting?” The last thing I needed was Maya to know what was going on.

“It’s Omar, going to have a quick chat about something.”

“Look! I haven’t got time to be doing this, I know what you did in London earlier on. I know your history of petty crimes which I could bust you for right now but I want to make a deal with you. So have I got your attention?”

Suddenly the air felt thin, and I started finding it hard to breathe. My heart was banging against my chest. All I could possibly do now was hear him out.

“What’s the deal?” I gulped

“From the information I have I know you’re in debt and that you owe a dealer a large amount of money. That’s you why stole the diamonds. Am I correct?”

“Yes.” I agreed through the door.

“Okay, I know your partner Omar was a part of this heist as well. So at the moment, the both of you are looking at roughly 10 years each but that’s not including your other petty crimes, which would take it up to 15 years for you.”

I slowly sat down on the floor with my back against the door. I was absolutely finished, how could all of this happen after everything I have been through. My mind was spiraling out of control, but I realised he never said what the deal was.

“So what is the deal?”

“It’s simple. Double cross Omar and I’ll have your 15-year sentence cut down to 5 years which could be cut down further for good behavior. Your debt will be cleared and your family will be relocated out of harms way.”

“What! What you’re asking me to do is wrong I can’t.” This felt like one big nightmare, I didn’t want to believe any of this was really happening.

“Think of your unborn child.”

My brain has stopped working like some sort of emergency shut down. Seconds later, I found myself pondering about how he knew about my unborn child. Did he plant a bug in the house to listen out for things or has he been keeping tabs on me for a while now?

“Look here’s a card with a number, when you decide to call me, we’ll go from there.”

A white card with a number written on it just like he said was slid under my door. The silence that fell afterwards was an indication that he had left. I picked myself up and staggered back upstairs into the bedroom. I found Maya fast asleep; she must have fallen asleep waiting for me to come back up.

Now that I was in bed I couldn’t stop thinking about the police officers deal. There’s still no proof that he was one, but with everything he said there’s no reason he would have lied. I just can’t give up Omar, I’ve known him since I was 14. He is my best friend… he’s had my back when nobody else did. He is practically family but I can’t afford to risk my family’s wellbeing and I need to see my new born child. These thoughts played in my head until I slowly drifted to sleep.

I found myself awake again a few hours later thanks to my phone ringing. I let it play out for a bit before answering since my ringtone was my favorite song.

“Bro! We have a huge problem. The police know we were involved but they can’t prove anything yet. We need to get rid of them diamonds tonight!”

So the early hours of this morning actually did happen, but how could Omar have known we were fucked? The only way is if the police officer that approached me approached him in a bid to double cross me. My head was spiraling out of control, I had to make my decision as soon as possible or prison would be my new home for the next 15 years.

“What! No way, I can’t afford to go prison my wife will take the kids away from me. I’ll set up the meet for tonight I’m so sorry things had to come to this bro.”

My mind was made up, I knew what had to do.

“Who were you talking to?” Maya walked into the room in her towel.

“Just Omar.”

“Well, I just want to let you know how proud I am of you Chris. I know you’re making a real effort.”

All I could do is smile but I felt sick to my stomach because I was going to betray my best friend. I spent the rest of the morning tactically planning out how I would go through everything. Once I figured out my move I was satisfied although regret plagued me. It came to the afternoon, which meant it was time to call back this number on the white card.

“I see you’ve come to your senses.”

“Listen up, I don’t know what kind of games you’re trying to play over here. I know you went to Omar to try double cross me, so by the sounds of things you are desperate. So this is the new deal, I give up the dealer and Omar for the 5 years in prison. My family get their debt cleared as well as being relocated from harms way.”

“Okay but I know this already.”

“I’m not done, I also want Omar’s daughter to get the kidney transplant she desperately needs and any medical attention for the foreseeable future. I want this all in writing or everything is off.” My heart was beating fast and my throat was getting dry.

“You’re smarter than you look but okay deal. Your car has a tracking device when you get to the dealer for the exchange, hug Omar and that’s when we’ll come in.” With that said the phone line went dead.

I took in a deep breath and let out a loud roaring sound. Maya wasn’t home so I didn’t need to hold back on how loud I was shouting. That phone conversation was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life. My plan wasn’t over yet as now I had to inform the dealer that the exchange would need to happen tonight. Calling him wasn’t the best idea so I messaged him, surprisingly he messaged back within seconds with “Ok.” Now that all the hard work was over and done with, the only thing left to do now was eating, sleeping then to hit the road.

After waking up from my nap, it was time to pick up Omar but before then I made Maya stay at her sisters with the kids. If anything happened to them because of this I would never forgive myself. She didn’t ask any questions, which was odd but I think she knew I had to take care of something important.

Now in the car with Omar, I was in no talking mood at all. The stars in the sky were nonexistent, between us and the road arose puffs of grey fog. It was really happening, this was serious… I was going to fuck up this friendship for life. Is this how Judas felt? The silence in the car made me believe that my heartbeat could be heard, every gulp I took felt like an indication of my guilt. I felt as if I was going to crack, but I couldn’t. I made the best possible deal for Omar and me.

“We’re here,” I couldn't bare to look at him, I just wanted things to be over and done with quickly. This location was almost in the middle of nowhere and very spacious. Ahead, I could see two black vans with people standing in front but I couldn’t make out how many people exactly. Moments later we found ourselves face to face with what were three men including the dealer.

There in the middle stood the main man, this being the third time I’ve ever laid eyes on him. I’ve always wondered about the wrinkles on his face, but too scared to say anything about them. His eyes look like they had killed many men with how lifeless they appeared to be. Me stealing these diamonds for him was the debt I owed him for fucking up a drop a few weeks ago. In his hands, he held two big suitcases but I didn’t flinch at all when he lowered both to reveal the money. I knew I wasn’t seeing any of it, so nothing for me to get worked up about. Just by seeing Omar’s facial expression I knew he was full of joy, which killed me even more. I brought out one diamond from the bag to prove we had it.

“Let's do this and be on our way,” I said whilst putting the diamond back in the bag. My heart was racing and my hand with the bag was shaking. I turned to Omar handing him the bag and hugged him, “Sorry I had no choice, I can’t lose my family.”

“Freeze! Don’t move you are under arrest!”

A swarm of cars pulled up and had us all surrounded; everything seemed to move in slow motion. Omar turned to me; his face said it all as he fell to his knees in anguish. Only then had I realised what I had actually done. I couldn’t look at his face whilst driving here but now I knew, if I looked him in the eye I’d vomit out of disgust. Did I do the right thing?

I have this little angel, for me, she left her wings. She has no idea how much happiness she truly brings. She brightens up my days with her smiles and her laughs. She helps me to remember all the blessings that I have. It seems like only yesterday with a teardrop in my eye that you were born into this world. She is the apple of my eye, the reason that I live. She is all that I could wish for, my heart to her I give, I promise I will find a way to save you.

“Drive! Drive!” Chris’s voice echoed throughout the car.

“Fuck! I’m trying.”

The car just wouldn’t start, the engine continuously growled back at me each time I attempt to start the car. Nothing was going to plan; I couldn’t afford to get caught not here right now.

“Argh this stupid piece of shit!” I hit the steering wheel. Thoughts of my daughter surfaced, I couldn’t believe I was going to let her down.

“Oi! Omar, get it together we can’t stay here for much longer.” Chis said as he got out the car with a small drawstring bag. It contained 10 diamonds stones worth 700 thousand pounds. We had just stolen it from an exhibition that is meant to be taking place in a few hours. It will only be a matter of time before they notice they are gone.

“Omar! Listen, if you don’t get out that car, Alissa won’t get the money she needs.”

Alissa was my daughter, I only agreed to this so I could pay for her medicine. The doctors have been trying to find a suitable donor for her kidney for months now. It’s important for us to keep her healthy; although expensive for the medication, my angel is worth it.

It didn’t take me long to regain my chain of thoughts after all the shouting Chris was doing. “Yeah, let’s go,” I said, as I hurried out of the car. Chris was in front so I was pacing behind him, making sure that I was following where he was headed to.

It was a scorching hot afternoon; the muggy heat was bound to everyone that was outside. We were dressed in all black, so you can imagine what this heat was doing to us as we were running. We began cutting corners just to get to somewhere that we could relax. Sweat trickled down our necks and backs like melted ice; I didn’t know how much longer I could carry on in this heat.

“Chris how much further man, we’ve been running for a good while.” I had finally caught up with him.

“We’re almost there, nobody can see us I know these back roads like my own dick.”

“Really nigga!”

Chris always liked to give me vulgar statements for reasons, I will never know but I’m used to it although I’ll never be comfortable with it.

Suddenly I see Chris take out his phone, and he’s muttering away, which left me confused. How has he got time to be running and answering his phone? Does he even understand the predicament we’re in right now? Idiot

“Three, Two, One…” Chris counted, and then a big white van appeared in front of us with the back doors opening simultaneously. “Get in quick!” A voice said and with that we were lunged forward into the van.

“We made it, thank God.”

“Was this your plan all along Chris? You should have fucking told me!” I yelled out in the van. I had to regain my composure since he did keep his word of getting us back home safely.

“Relax man, I didn’t tell you because you would have started asking too many questions and you know that shit annoys me” he begun adjusting himself amongst all the boxes, bags and other equipment that surrounded us.

“True, I have to thank you for everything bro. You know this it means everything to me that you agreed to do this for Alissa.” I couldn’t stop thinking about Alissa now; I just wanted to get home to give her the biggest kiss ever.

“Okay, it’s going to be a long five-hour journey back to Manchester so make yourself comfortable mate. I’m going to sleep, as breaking into places is tiring” He repositioned his body against the boxes all around us.

“Yeah do your thing man, I’m wide awake so doubt I’ll be going sleep anytime soon,” I said, but then I heard snoring noises. I was talking to myself all this time Chris was fast asleep. I dipped into my pocket, pulled out a picture of Alissa and stared at it thinking of my little girl.

Hours gradually passed and before I knew it, we had reached Manchester.

“Chris, wake up already we’re back in manny. He sat up, rubbing his tired eyes.

“That was quick, I was about to fuck this model man!”

I didn’t want to hear the crap from his dream; I just wanted to get home to her. We got out of the van ten minutes later after it stopped round the corner from where I lived. Chris paid the driver money for dropping us and he drove off.

“Okay… so this is the plan, I’m going to meet the buyer in two days so if you want you can come.”

“Yeah no worries I’ll come with you, just let me know where and when” I started to make my way home.

I’ve known Chris since I was 14- years old. He’s gotten me through some real rough patches especially after my wife died. That’s why I agreed to go through with this; he had everything planned to precision.

I felt a raindrop fall against my skin, followed by several others, so I decided to jog the rest of the way home. Finally, I got to my front door. As soon as I put my key in to enter my house I was given the warmest of welcomes.

“Daddy, Daddy!” Alissa blurted out as she ran to give me a hug. Her arms felt so soft the way she wrapped them around me, she held onto me so tightly. These are the moments that I cherish with Alissa. I felt like all my worries lose their keen sting and my optimism raises its head from the dirt. Maybe the hope had been there all along, but without love, it was trapped. I was days away from curing my baby girl.

“I missed you too, Alissa.” I now picked her up and walked into the house shutting the door behind me.

“Oh, you’re back now!”

“Yeah, I’m finally back thank you so much for looking after she whilst I was gone,” I said as I walked into the kitchen holding Alissa. There stood Maria was washing up the dishes.

Maria was Alissa’s schoolteacher, whom I have gotten close to. She helps out from time to time for which I really appreciate.

She was all about simplicity, making things easy, helping those around her to relax and be happy with what they have.

“No problem, you know I always like to help. I’m just going to wash this up quickly then I’ll be off. Your food is in the microwave, and Alissa has already eaten.” She said cheerfully.

“You really are a blessing, let me tuck Alissa into bed and I’ll show you out.”

“I don’t want to sleep, though.” Alissa started whining.

“Eh! Alissa! Remember what I told you? You need to get a lot of rest so you don’t get sick.”

“Fine daddy, I’m feeling a bit tired now.” She yawned.

I took her up stairs and put her in her bed, not before praying to her. She loved to pray even at her young age of nine.

“Goodnight Alissa I love you,” I said sincerely

“Daddy wait!” she blurted out.

“What’s wrong?” I said, hoping she wasn’t in any distress.

“I had a dream about mummy, she said she wants you to be happy with Maria and that she knows how much you love me and her.” Alissa shut her eyes. 15 minutes after seeing Maria out the door, I decided to have a quick shower and get ready for bed, as I still hadn’t slept since the day before. Once I was comfortable in bed I felt the sweet release from the worries of the world. It was only 9:30pm and I knew I had to be up early to drop Alissa to school so away I started to drift.

The following morning I was up and out for my early morning jog. The coolness of the early morning is deceptive; the sun has barely risen and this altitude is always cooler. Me jogging this early is normal, I liked to keep fit and busy since I was getting old. Something felt odd this morning, I tried to shake it off but I couldn’t seem to for some odd reason.

“Don’t stop jogging, act natural and this will all be over with quickly.” Said this man who started jogging by my side.

I had no idea where he came from, could he have been following me all this time? It would make sense why I had an unsettling feeling all this time. I couldn’t see his face properly because he had his hood up and although he was jogging by my side, he made sure there was enough space so he couldn’t be seen.

“Okay, so what happens now?”

“I know you helped Chris steal those diamonds, I just can’t prove it right now. If you help me, I can get you full immunity from all charges.”

My heart sunk instantly, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. How did this happen? I can’t betray Chris, I refuse after he paid for Alissa’s first operation. I owe him everything.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, are you even part of the police? Look this is where I leave you and enter my house.” I picked up the pace when I saw my front porch, but that’s when I heard him say, “Check under your plant pot my card is there.”

With that, he turned around in the opposite direction and jogged on. I rushed to the plant pot and just like he said the card was there. A sudden rush of heat overwhelmed me; I was so confused. This wasn’t supposed to be happening. When I got inside, I started pacing up and down thinking endlessly of going prison.

“Daddy, what’s wrong?” Alissa said catching me off guard.

“Nothing, don’t worry about me. How do you feel about Maria taking you to school this morning?”

“Yay!”

“Alright go and brush your teeth, I’ll come and give you your bath and get you ready for school.”

This wouldn’t be the first time that I called Maria to come take Alissa to school for me. After calling Maria and getting her prepared for school, I felt a bit calmer but there was still a lot I had to do. 8:30am came and Maria had just popped by and taken Alissa for me, all I needed to do now was call Chris and tell him what happened.

“Bro! We have a huge problem the police know we were involved but they can’t prove anything yet. We need to get rid of them diamonds tonight!”

“What! No way, I can’t afford to go prison my wife will take the kids away from me. Fine, I’ll set up the meet for tonight I’m so sorry things had to come to this bro.” He sounded very apologetic like everything was his fault, which was strange because this guy in all the years I’ve known him had never apologized for a thing.

Time seemed to have no patience and before I knew it I was already on my way with Chris to make the drop. Alissa was with Maria, so I had one less thing to worry about already. As we drove to the location the silence in the car was making me nervous. It was unusual for Chris to be this quiet he would normally always crack some sort of vulgar banter but I guess he was in his zone.

“We’re here,” he said without even flinching or looking at me which I found weird. We were in the middle of nowhere by the looks of things, I just wanted to get this over and done with. I could see two blacked out vans ahead of us with what looked like three men standing in front of them. A few moments later we were standing a few meters in opposite them not too close, but close enough to have a good look at them.

It was evident the guy in front was the leader, the map of wrinkles on his face told of the most incredible journey that one could only wonder about. His eyes dead eyes reflected the charcoal clouds above; I just knew this man was not to be messed with. In his hands, he clasped two large suitcases and my heart skipped a beat when he lowered both to reveal the money. Chris brought out one diamond from the bag; I guess that was their ways of showing they had the real things.

“Let's do this and be on our way,” Chris said, as he put the diamond back in the bag. The man just nodded, as he closed the briefcases again. Chris now turned to me, he handed the bag to me and gave me a hug saying, “Sorry I had no choice, I can’t lose my family.” I didn’t understand what he meant by that until I heard a swarm of cars pull up.

“Freeze! Don’t move you are under arrest!”

I turned to Chris realizing that this had been a set up by him. All the apologizing he was doing was because he had this all planned out. I fell to my knees with thoughts of Alissa sleeping away from me and wondering how my own friend could betray me like this.